15 strategies to motivate teens/adults with autism to exercise At Matthew’s IPP Meeting last year, (Individual Program Plan–more about what that is HERE) we got on the topic of recreation. What does Matthew like to do in his spare time? What does his social life look like? What goals should we set for the future? “I would love it if you could get more exercise, Matthew” I said, glancing at the belly that my handsome 27 year old son has developed in the last few years, “Not just from doing … [Read more...]
Autism FAQ: What to do when people aren’t nice
Question: We were at a family gathering, and my aunt refused to sit next to my child at the table. I was so hurt, I just lost it, which made things worse (to say the least.) Any ideas for how to handle these scenes in the future? Yuck, I am so sorry. Let me tell you how I learned from a similar situation. Matthew was about 21 and the two of us were flying from California to Pennsylvania after Christmas break. I was exhausted from the holidays (like most parents) and was on edge because … [Read more...]
Applying for SSI Benefits for a Child with Autism
Does my child with autism qualify for SSI? This is a question that I'm asked frequently, and so I am grateful that Ram Meyyappan, the senior editor and manager of Social Security Disability Help, has offered to answer: Some children who live with autism may qualify for Social Security Disability benefits, or SSI. The condition, however, must meet a certain level of severity in order for a child to qualify. Children with severe forms of autism will qualify for benefits under the … [Read more...]
Parent/teacher communication: making a connection
Do you have a good connection with your child's teacher? Did you know that they really want to connect with you? I know this, because I talk to groups of teachers often about my experience raising a child with autism, and the question teachers ask most frequently is this: I could do a better job if I could communicate more with parents. How can I get them to talk to me? I flash back to the year that I was that parent, and how Matthew's teacher found a way to connect with me: Matthew … [Read more...]
Siblings with autism: How do you ‘splain that?
Your sibling has autism. How do you explain it to your friends? I'll never forget the day that my son John, who was 9 at the time, brought a friend from school over to work on a geography project. He was a little nervous, because this friend had not met Matthew. What if Matthew said or did something embarrassing? How would he explain autism? Just as the boys were finishing a snack and starting the project, Matthew got home from school. "Who are you?" he asked the boy in a … [Read more...]
Autism: 11 FAQ’s answered
Did you know that parents of children with autism like it when you ask them questions about their experience? At least I do. Sometimes we get tongue tied when answering because autism is complicated, and because we are emotional. Here is a list of the 11 most frequent questions that I am asked, along with answers: 1) What is autism, and how severe is Matthew’s case? Autism is a neurological disorder; not a disease. It is a broad spectrum disorder, meaning that people with autism can be a … [Read more...]
Friending with autism? Explaining the Facebook Friend
My husband and I went to a graduation party over the weekend, and while he went to get us something to drink, I was greeted by a very friendly man wearing white jeans and a Tommy Bahama shirt who acted like he was a long lost friend. I had no idea who he was but played along for a bit ("Hey there!") hoping that eventually a light would go on. Just as he was filling me in on his shoulder surgery, it hit me. This man was a Facebook friend, one who I hadn't actually talked to in person since were … [Read more...]
Autism FAQ: How can I help my child get “unstuck”?
“Mom?” Matthew asked, “Where is the closest airport?” “Oakland,” I answered with a sigh. “Where is the next airport?” “San Francisco. Then San Jose, Morgan Hill…” “Stop!” Matthew wailed,”I need to ask you first.” Matthew was 10 years old, and his obsession with airports was wearing me out. I was only allowed to stop answering him when the phone or the doorbell interrupted us. He was stuck. Looking back, I believe that Matthew wasn’t intentionally trying to drive me (and … [Read more...]
Autism FAQ: How do I talk to my son/daughter about sex? a story with tips
The morning of May 22, 2006, I set my alarm for 4 a.m. I wanted to be the first one to wish Matthew a happy birthday. He was in a college program at Camphill Soltane near Philadelphia. Matthew answered the house telephone on the first ring. He knew I would call. “Matthew!” I said. “You’re 20! Can you believe it?” “Yes,” he responded flatly. “But Mom? I have something very important to ask you. I’ve been thinking about Amy. Can we go see her?” Matthew had met Amy three years before … [Read more...]
Autism, parenting & beyond: 12 FAQ’s answered
Did you know that parents of children with autism like it when you ask them questions about their experience? At least I do. Sometimes we get tongue tied when answering because autism is complicated, and because we are emotional. Here is a list of the 11 most frequent questions that I am asked, along with answers: 1) What is autism, and how severe is Matthew’s case? Autism is a neurological disorder; not a disease. It is a broad spectrum disorder, meaning it's possible to be … [Read more...]